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Friday, February 5, 2016

BLOOD PRESSURE

© MMXVI V.1.0.3
by Morley Evans

I think my blood pressure is remarkably good. I take it once in a while just for fun. Today it was 108/72 with a pulse of 64. That was after I took it several times. The first time it was 154/85. I sat quietly breathing in through my nose and breathing out through my mouth. That lowers blood pressure. According to the handy British chart below, my blood pressure is perfect. I don’t usually have to take it more than once. I always used to win the blood pressure rodeo at the drug store. This would amaze the pharmacists who would check to see if their machine was broken. After weight-lifting, my blood pressure goes way up. After the deadlift my pulse can be as high as 150, but it goes back down to less than 90 in a minute. 

My blood pressure has always surprised doctors. Apparently, mine is unusual. One doctor thought I should be taking something to raise my blood pressure. Dr. John N. Alport and Dr. Chris Annandale both thought my arteries must be plugged because I have high cholesterol. They should go back to medical school. My cholesterol is OVER 340 mg/dl or OVER 9 mmol/L! I should be dead according to them. But I’m not dead. This has been my blood pressure for decades. If my arteries were blocked by cholesterol, I would have high blood pressure. What do they teach in medical school? It actually doesn't matter. Once a doctor graduates he becomes a "made man." Medicine is just like the Mafia. It's even better!



1 comment:

Natalia Campos said...

Keeping track of your own blood pressure is such a good idea. I’ve noticed that my blood pressure and pulse are always in the lower range of normal when I'm eating well and exercising. I’ve found my doctor to be very encouraging when it comes to tracking my own BP and bringing my own record to any visits.