by Morley Evans
I think my blood pressure is remarkably good. I take it once in a while just for fun. Today it was 108/72 with a pulse of 64. That was after I took it several times. The first time it was 154/85. I sat quietly breathing in through my nose and breathing out through my mouth. That lowers blood pressure. According to the handy British chart below, my blood pressure is perfect. I don’t usually have to take it more than once. I always used to win the blood pressure rodeo at the drug store. This would amaze the pharmacists who would check to see if their machine was broken. After weight-lifting, my blood pressure goes way up. After the deadlift my pulse can be as high as 150, but it goes back down to less than 90 in a minute.
My blood pressure has always surprised doctors. Apparently, mine is unusual. One doctor thought I should be taking something to raise my blood pressure. Dr. John N. Alport and Dr. Chris Annandale both thought my arteries must be plugged because I have high cholesterol. They should go back to medical school. My cholesterol is OVER 340 mg/dl or OVER 9 mmol/L! I should be dead according to them. But I’m not dead. This has been my blood pressure for decades. If my arteries were blocked by cholesterol, I would have high blood pressure. What do they teach in medical school? It actually doesn't matter. Once a doctor graduates he becomes a "made man." Medicine is just like the Mafia. It's even better!